Slowing down life’s pace through seasonal presence….
This past weekend, I was in Moab for a bachelorette party. The weather was amazing. Moab was getting light rain showers throughout the day, but they didn't hinder our activities. The temperature was incredibly comfortable. If you know about Moab, you know that's not very common this time of year—it's usually pretty darn hot. The smell of the rain in the desert was also such a special scent.
However, what I found most profound was on Saturday afternoon, while lounging on the back deck of our rental. You could see very subtle changes in the plant life that hinted at the shift in seasons. The greens were slightly muted on some of the trees, with very small patches shifting to more yellow tones. Even though the temperatures were comfortable and warm, there was a slight whisper of something cooler lacing through the warm breeze. Fall is on the precipice. While I've started to become aware of more noticeable shifts in my mountain town of Ouray, to see it start to play out in Moab—which feels to me to be in perpetual summer until it becomes winter—felt important somehow.
Being suddenly aware of the subtle transitions of the natural world around me had me thinking about the importance of presence, of being in the moment as much as you can. This is a notion that, as a coach, I repeatedly emphasize to my clients and in my musings. I also try to practice what I preach, yet I am human just like everyone else. This is most definitely an area of opportunity for me in my day-to-day living. Yet sitting on that deck, feeling the summer season slipping away before my eyes in slow motion, had me wondering about the pros and cons of being present.
Wait, there are cons to being present? Well, yes—let's be honest, of course there are. This is likely why we have to work at it, be reminded constantly, and practice it regularly. The biggest con to being in this moment with your whole self is that it can be uncomfortable, even painful. It's much easier to be present when we're with loved ones, surrounded by joy, comfortable temperatures, happy moods, no major worries in life, finances going well, food available, basic needs met, etc. Yet when does all of that happen at once and last? Not often.
Life is hard. Life is complicated. We have jobs, deadlines, demands from those we care for, responsibilities, heartaches, anxiety, lack of community, and other stressors that surround us pretty much all the time. Being present with all that can be overwhelming, and for some, painful. "Sitting with your emotions"—aka being in this moment while experiencing uncomfortable emotional states—is not easy. That's why we have TV, drugs, alcohol, social media, books, hobbies, etc. to numb out with, to distract us. It makes it easy to escape, even just for a few minutes, from what's happening in our lives.
I'm not saying that being present isn't a good thing. I'm simply pointing out that there's a natural downside to being present. It can be painful and uncomfortable. It can also create a sense of submission if you're someone who strives for control. Yet it's worth it! Being present can also be an antidote for what ultimately causes the pain in the first place. The more we practice, the less power the discomfort has over us. We build the capacity to hold that discomfort. The more capacity we build, the more we can handle without numbing out. The more we do without numbing out allows us to take in more joy and quality in our daily lives. This frees us up and makes us willing to be "with" life's discomforts more, so we can be more present and experience more joy.
That's the pro of being present. Like with any habit we form, there's a learning curve and a growth curve. If you give up as soon as things get uncomfortable or hard, you miss the best part.
The majority of us experience this phenomenon as we age: life seems to move faster and faster. It starts to speed by. Like, for example, the summer transition into fall, which we're all experiencing one way or another here in the northern hemisphere. Like it has for me over the last decade, I wake up one day and fall is almost over and winter is arriving. Bam. What happened? It's like fall just transitioned without my noticing, and I missed the process. It's because I wasn't present with myself and the nature around me. Not a bad thing. Not unusual even. Yet that's why we all start to feel like life is flying by faster and faster every year. We get busier and more distracted by events, people, and things.
This year I want to do it differently. I kind of made that commitment to myself sitting on the deck in Moab this weekend. I want to be with the fall transition. I want to observe in real time, not "wake up" suddenly every few weeks to notice the changes, but to make a daily practice of checking in with the outdoors every day. Looking for what hasn't shifted yet and for what is transitioning. If I can do this multiple times throughout every day, even better. I want this fall to feel long because instead of just going about my daily responsibilities on autopilot, I want life to live within me as much as I am living my life.
I invite you, my reader, to do the same. On a daily basis, take a few minutes out of each day (or multiple times throughout the day) to simply pause. Go outside, even if it's just to your doorstep. Use your five senses. Feel the temperature of the air each day and make a note of how it feels. Is it breezy? Is it hot, dry, cool, humid? What do you smell on the air? How did it change from yesterday or the day before, or from this morning to this evening? What sounds do you hear? Are the bird songs or insect sounds the same or different? Do you hear children playing or rain falling? Look at the flora and fauna around you. What changes do you see in the plants? Are your hummingbirds still visiting? Do you see more or less activity with the creatures that cohabitate the land around you? Chipmunks, squirrels, or even local bears more active gathering for the upcoming winter? Same birds around, or have they migrated away? Then with taste—are you noticing differences in what you're craving regarding your snacks and meals? What do you notice about taste? Can you taste things on the air?
Bonus activity: make short notes in a journal or notebook each day to track your observations.
When you're present in the moment, it can also relieve anxiety and stress caused by things that are likely out of your direct control. It helps create space for your brain, heart, and body to process what's happening around you in real time, and not the made-up stressors our minds fool us with. Many times we're not in any danger, yet our nervous systems think we have to be in freeze, fight, or flight mode with every potentially missed deadline, weird look from that person in the grocery store, or being cut off in traffic. When feeling anxious, irritated, or even angry, try to pause and notice life around you. It might help reprioritize what's real and important.
If you try this challenge, even for a day, I would love to hear your experience. There's no right or wrong way to go about this practice of being in presence other than making the intention to do so. It allows you to hold on to the preciousness of each moment and can show us how much we are a part of the nature around us. We are precious natural things that live in nature alongside the changing leaves on the trees.
